Dirty Purple Converse

Episodes of Disbelief

2009-10-31T00:57:00.000-07:00

Thursday night, 10:32pm. Starbucks.

While waiting for our drinks, Heather and I were approached by a Starbucks employee who had just gotten off of his shift.

SE (Starbucks employee): Excuse me, I just want to steal some of this honey. [grabs a handful]

H: That's fine. We stole some ourselves.

SE: I can tell. I filled this container up just a few minutes ago and now look- it's almost empty.

M: Oh well that wasn't us. There must be honey goblins or something lurking about.

SE: You know, my friend once saw a goblin.

H: Really?

SE: Yeah, he caught it and brought it home. He locked it in his closet. The next day he looked in and it was really just a homeless black girl.

H: ...

M: ...

SE: That's sad, huh? Oh well. Don't do shrooms!

And then he scampered away.

So she waits...

2009-10-31T00:52:00.000-07:00

Welp- made it through this week after all. Couple of moments there where I wasn't sure but I managed to pull through. Life is hectic and often sleep-deprived. I suppose it's part of the whole "I'm a college student" thing, though I wish it didn't have to be. Maybe I'm just getting old and crotchety, but I'd really rather get a good night's sleep than just about anything.

[pause as I realize what time it is and the fact that I could be asleep right now]

...

[wow.]

I've decided, yet again, that I'm going to try to switch to some healthier habits. Went for a run today, which was lovely and really cleared my head. Attempted meditation tonight. Given that it's the first time I've tried it since I was seven at Bestamor's house and couldn't sit still for any reason, I'm pleased with my focus. Admittedly, I am using a mantra to help focus, but still. I'm excited.

Oh, and I wasted $50 and four hours tonight on the most ridiculously frustrating steaming pile of art I've ever seen. And I'm normally down for crazy performance art-eque theatre pieces. No. This was a waste of my time and money and I am quite bitter. Or rather, I was bitter. Now I'm just resigned. It's too late now to do anything about it and it was a class requirement. I figure I've grown from this experience. I now know what not to do on stage. Hmph.

Coming up blank:

2009-10-24T15:12:00.001-07:00

And so the annual search for a halloween costume that is both appropriately nerdy and somewhat attractive continues.

One week and counting.

Oh dear...

2009-10-20T19:08:00.001-07:00

2 midterms

1 show model

1 light plot

1 drafted plan

1283098204986046 pieces of research

6 applications

3 phone calls

3 meetings

12 books

4 notebooks

3 groups

...1 Megan.

God Rest Ye Purple Converse

2009-10-20T13:13:00.000-07:00

And thus making the name of my blog inaccurate, I have finally retired my poor purple shoes. They've served me well and deserve a rest. Instead I got periwinkle converse! The legend lives on.

Also?

http://epeolatry.proboards.com/index.cgi

Yes, I am the achorman.

2009-10-12T21:27:00.000-07:00

And thus we enter Week Three of my final year as an undergraduate.

The quarter is moving much faster than I expected. Theoretically I even have a midterm this week, though I honestly have no idea what the test will actually be like. The professor has spent the majority of lectures showing us pictures of his colonoscopy and lecturing us on the poetry of wildfires. Both of which, while vaguely disturbing and interesting respectively, do very little to indicate how the test will play out. I have careful notes, of course, so I'm hoping it won't be too damaging.

Every deadline is sneaking up on me. Grad school, Disney internship, etc. Good lord.

Zeitgeist!

2009-09-30T09:39:00.000-07:00

So here I am, writing from a terminal in Cyber A because my computer is a shifty, promiscuous tramp and I can't take her anywhere. The shift key on this computer sticks, so if there are grammatical problems of that sort, blame to keyboard, not me.

In latest news, I seem to have misplaced my class. It's supposed to be held in the Yurt, which is a nifty little sixteen-sided hut that the department built near the gym (it's also next to the Barn, which is, well, a barn- also built by our department; good lord I love this school sometimes). Unfortunately, after trekking over with my oversized newsprint pad and copious amounts of charcoal, both doors were locked. I suspect I may have been maliciously deceived and that class is actually only on Monday, rather than Monday and Wednesday, as I had previously supposed. Or perhaps it's all a giant conspiracy.

As of late I've been remarkably restless. School is, as always, a mix of fascinating and horrifyingly dull. Cliff, a happy little grey fellow who claps a good deal, is once again a part of my life, which provides a bright spot of glowy glee in my day. This saves me from having to kill myself after being forced to sit through a twenty minute viewing of the photos from my Biology professor's colonoscopy. (By the way, following this extremely random and rather disturbing lecture with "a colon is a part of biology and colonoscopies are a wonderful scientific development" does NOT make it connect meaningfully to the course.)

Downward Slope

2009-09-29T18:46:00.000-07:00

"Who has not sat before his heart's own curtain? It lifts: and the scenery is falling apart."

-Rilke

A Fresh Start

2009-09-27T10:29:00.000-07:00

As excited as I was for this year, I didn't realize quite how nice it would be to really start over and actually establish my own identity, separate from anyone else. Admittedly, I've already done some relatively stupid things, but I've done them all in a hopefully not too humiliating way. I'm attempting to really meet all of the people I've seen and had classes with for the last two years. My social circle has been painfully small and it seems silly not to take advantage of the wonderful people at this school. I've had my problems with some of them, but hopefully that can be forgotten. I think it's already a little better after the party last night.

[Note to self: don't drink. ever.]

Oh, and it pleases me to no end that I still have all of Cohen's Closing Time memorized.

On the Radio

2009-09-27T10:24:00.001-07:00

I rather think that tea is the greatest invention ever. To the person who thought putting herbs in hot water was a grand idea, bravo.

Pish tosh and various types of humbuggery

2009-05-21T10:41:00.001-07:00

I've decided that I am no longer allowed to have coffee. Though I am entirely addicted to it (and particularly to a vile, jet-fuel drink that involves nothing but hot water and lots and lots of espresso), I'm going to try to move back towards the herbal tea end of the spectrum, if only for the sanity of those who have to sit next to me during Drama 120. I am unstable enough on your average Tuesday, so can you imagine the terror that can ensue from a highly caffeinated Megan watching videos of butoh and finding intense artistic inspiration in the midst of a rather sedate classroom? Kate is nodding as I write this. I think I traumatized a poor girl who thought I looked like a friendly stranger and sat next to me on Tuesday. Kate, at least, is somewhat used to my insanity.

Richard II is a quite remarkably boring play, particularly for Shakespeare's general standards. I'm willing to forgive it, however, if only on the basis of its incredibly beautiful language. I cannot even count the number of gorgeous monologues I'm excited to explore. And to hell with feeling stuck with women's monologues. As long as the piece isn't going on and on about how powerful his love of so-and-so is, there is absolutely no reason why I shouldn't be able to do a masculine monologue.

But I ramble...

Oh, and thank god for finally finding a good used bookstore in Orange County. I was about to go stark, raving mad.

2009-05-08T05:31:00.001-07:00

its an unnameable feeling
to look up at the sky
and see the stars fading-
the dark turn to light
and realize that you've been up the whole night

where do you go now?

jealousy

2009-04-17T09:48:00.000-07:00

"It is cruel, you know, that music should be so beautiful. It has the beauty of loneliness of pain: of strength and freedom. The beauty of disappointment and never-satisfied love. The cruel beauty of nature and everlasting beauty of monotony."
-Benjamin Britten

costume jewelry

2009-04-16T10:34:00.001-07:00

a battalion of butterflies-
consumed by their war against the dim and dying light-
march erratically,
their plans and formations
disguised so completely
even they think they're merely dancing.
the flower are their sentry towers,
both strong and weak
beset on all sides by potential fiends
who could turn at a moment's notice.

in the stronghold of their garden
they hold all the accounts
of a woman possessed,
feverish,
foggy with smoke,
in a nimbus of dreamlike delirium.
she read cheap romances,
smashed all corsets,
costume jewelry,
pretentious hard-ons,
and sexy plumed hats.

and swarms of hummingbirds,
connected by springs,
continue increasing
tempered by my narcissistic soul.
an increasingly diabolic issue
of salvation and redemption.
it is a trivial solution that,
considering the effects and poetic repercussions,
angels have shapes
and need not die.

the future belongs to the fantastic.

She could spit in the eyes of fools

2009-03-17T17:29:00.000-07:00

Now, despite the fact that I am almost 98.6% positive that no one actually reads this bloody thing, I am still writing. Admittedly, I am writing completely erratically, without any sort of actual intended schedule or intent and, generally, without any particular point or through line, so I suppose there isn't much to expect.

At least now I know what I'm doing for the majority of my summer. The internship with Disney animation actually came through and for ten weeks I'll be working in what is one of the most amazing buildings in the United States. Yes, that's right, its the building with the hat on it. Be jealous. Are you jealous? Okay, good. Now stop.

Of course, this amazing news comes with its drawbacks- namely, that it means Mumma and I may not make it to Montana this summer, though I am determined. It just may mean that I need to find a store that sells both rope and chloroform. It'll be a bit harder to drive from here to Montana with only me behind the wheel, but I'll just take a few rest stops. No worries. Then it will be too late for her to go back, right? Riiiiiiiight?

Ah, but I ramble.

I'm also plotting a way to get to know more people at UCIrvine past just a knowing-their-name-and-sometimes-see-them-around state. Its getting a little depressing. Not like "OMGDEARGODI'MALLALONE" depressing. I just feel a little distant from everyone. Thus, I'm auditioning for things again. I've realized that among the Drama Dept, people tend to meet each other through the shows here (not that this is really that surprising). I haven't even teched any shows. All my 101 unit have been in the shop where contact with people is limited, in general, to the shop techs and grad students, which is fine, but its not really a group I'm around a whole lot outside of the shop.

So I went and auditioned for Loving Lives, which was my first audition in two years. I was sick and tired and of course had forgotten ALL my audition protocol, but it was fun and low-stress and broke my fear of auditioning again. Its strange- for a completely unfruitful effort, it actually bore a surprising amount of fruit.

Yes, I'm aware that doesn't really make sense.

But this is my blog and I'll write as I please. Grrr...

QotD

2009-03-03T21:09:00.001-08:00

Why do perfectly capable people always opt for the largest stall in the bathroom?

...just curious.

I know its short, but at least its something.

2009-03-03T21:00:00.001-08:00

Yes, I know. I'm dreadful at keeping those type of commitments. I just get busy and don't get a chance to take any photos. I'll probably pick it up again at some point, once all of my insanity has passed.

So I have the last Disney interview for the Animation Dept. interview this Thursday. They told me over the phone that its down to me and one other person and, though at first it got me really excited, its now making me pretty nervous. I'm just trying to stay focused about the whole thing.